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Ben Stone is a lazy, immature 23-year-old Jewish Canadian slacker in the process of establishing with his friends a website listing nude scenes in film called "fleshofthestars.com". He also happens to live illegally in California, so he does not have to pay taxes. Instead, he lives on a $14,000 settlement after a mail truck ran over his foot. Alison Scott is a responsible, career-minded woman who gets promoted to be an anchorwoman for E! News Live. One night, while she celebrates her promotion, Alison and Ben meet at a club, get drunk, and end up having sex. Due to a misunderstanding, they do not use contraception: Alison uses the phrase "just do it" to encourage Ben to put the condom on faster, which he misinterprets as "a condom is not needed". When the alcohol wears off, they quickly learn they have little in common during breakfast, in which he disgusts her with his lifestyle. Eight weeks later, however, Alison experiences morning sickness during an interview with James Franco and comes to the discovery that she is pregnant. After trying 15 different pregnancy tests with the same result, she contacts Ben to tell him the news. Taken aback, Ben says he will be there to support Alison having the baby. The odd couple's efforts to develop a relationship include Ben making an awkward marriage proposal, without a ring.
After some considerable success at first, tensions surface in the relationship. Alison is increasingly anxious over Ben's lack of responsibility and is paranoid he will leave her, as a result of watching her sister Debbie's failing marriage. Her husband Pete works as a talent scout, but he strangely leaves at odd hours in the night. Upon investigating, it is learned he is part of a fantasy baseball draft, instead of cheating, which he explains he needs to have some time free from her controlling manner. Similarly, Ben feels that Alison is overly controlling, as a result of which the couple separates after a bitter argument. Ben and Pete then take a road-trip to Las Vegas. Under the influence of drugs, they realize their loss and decide to return and take responsibility. Ben goes to great effort to change his ways including getting a real job and an apartment with a baby's room. Subsequently, Alison goes into labor and is not able to contact her doctor, forcing her to contact Ben again due to her sister Debbie and Pete's out-of-town trip. Ben also tries to contact Alison's gynecologist, but finds out through his secretary that he is at a Bar Mitzvah in San Francisco. After leaving a hate-filled message on the doctor's voicemail, Ben increases his efforts to find a doctor that will deliver his child. He eventually finds one, but Alison's wishes clash with the doctor's choice for a smooth and safe birth. Ben talks with the doctor, after which he is willing to do it Alison's way. After a while, Alison regrets her insistence and wants it the doctor's original way after all, but it is too late for that now. She apologizes for doubting his commitment and admits that she never thought the man she loved would be the one who got her pregnant. A while later, Debbie and Pete arrive, but Alison makes Pete wait in the waiting room. Ben then orders Debbie out after assuming she was the one who could save the day. The couple welcomes the birth of a baby girl (a boy in the alternate ending), and settle down happily together.
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